If I had never been subjected to this story I would have been a happy man!
Cover Art By: Tsuneo Sanda
Art By: Dave Nesetlle, Killian Plunkett & Vickie Williams
Written By: Killian Plunkett
As I have siphoned through this first batch of Tales stories there have been some clunkers and a few commendable stories, but the vast majority have been middle of the road exercises in the comic book medium. Thanks to Sand Blasted I believe the scales have been titled back towards this first run being horrendous, because not even the greatest of the rest of the stories can separate itself from the stink that is Sand Blasted. Am I being harsh? Sure, I am, but it’s well deserved. It’s been a long time since I read a story so short that made my brain ache in such glorious fashion.
I’m not going to list a litany of reasons as to why Sand Blasted is easily the worst bit of Star Wars I have reviewed for the site so far. I’m not going to do that because despite being a short story it is so chock full of vileness that to list all the reasons for its ineptitude would take up far too much time. I’ll try to keep it simple, if that is even possible. Sand Blasted is full of nothing but inept characters. The writing is sophomoric at best, and I’m not referring to the intelligence level of the characters. They are supposed to be dumb, but the writing around them is even worse, in its attempts to portray the characters as dumb it managed to lower my IQ quite a bit. The art is gosh darn bad, and you know what, I’m going to stop there. You get the picture, or you should, hopefully.
There isn’t much else for me to go into. At this point I believe I have painted a good enough picture of why Sand Blasted is an abysmal effort. If you are looking for a reason why Tales never really caught on, Sand Blasted and other stories of its ilk provide all the reasons one needs. For the love of your brain, look for Dark Troopers elsewhere and skip Sand Blasted.